Betrayal Never Comes From An Enemy
It’s a fact that loyalty and trust have limits, especially where business and money are concerned, and supposed friends have short memories when you are no longer of use to them. When you’re putting cash in people’s pockets everyone will appear to be your friend, but are they? I will say definitely not! Most will stab you in the back or sabotage your operations if they think it will benefit them and will be gleeful, not to your face of course, if you or your business encounters major problems. And then, if you fall they will happily join your competitors in “Putting The Boot In” to try to ensure you don’t get back up again as they circle like vultures looking for any scraps of business or opportunities they can find.
So, understand there are no friends in business, and the truth is you will encounter very few in life, in general. Think about your friends now, and ask yourself, why are they your friends? What do they have to gain from being around you? How can they use you or profit from you? Even if they have nothing to gain from you, consider if they would be gleefully “Putting The Boot In” if you tripped and fell… Most would, as it would enlighten their sad lives and give them something to gossip about.
If you think what I am saying is extreme then consider how many women would date or marry a poor man, not just have sex with him, but commit to a poor man. And how many men would date or marry a fat or ugly woman? How many intimate relationships and marriages are split up because one partner finds something they consider better? So, tell me why do you think people will be more loyal and moral in business than they are in their personal lives?
In my world of close protection, training, and investigations it can be taken for granted that people whom you employ and work with, will be trying to steal your contacts, clients, and students, period. Egos, jealousy, and entitlement will blur out most people’s sense of loyalty when they believe there could be cash on the table, and they have the opportunity to cut you out of the picture.
Most people will disregard that you may have worked daily for years to build your business, they will just see you and think that they are better than you, so they should have what’s yours. While such people are nice to your face they will be working to belittle and sabotage you at every opportunity, especially in front of clients.
And then there will be those who know they could never work as hard or achieve what you have and will be jealous. Such people will sell you out at the first opportunity and will be happy to see you fall. I have seen this numerous times! Typically, these people will cause you horrendous issues but also, more often than not, end up cutting their own throats in the process. A wise man knows that a person who will betray someone for your coins, will betray you for another’s coins.
Everyone is entitled and deserves compensation, gratitude, and compliments for their hard work, but some will never be satisfied. Even when such people are well looked after, their discontent will lead to behavior that can embarrass and sabotage you and your business. I have immediately fired quite a few people who have decided not to turn up for work with short notice after we had disputes about their behavior or because they wanted higher pay. Why? Because I knew their behavior, in their minds, was to show me how important they were, and how I was dependent on them as they were essential employees. But all their behavior did was quickly show them how irrelevant they really were to me and my business.
Friction and disputes are never good for a business, especially a small business, as usually, you don’t have the time or resources to fight battles while keeping things stable to ensure you continue to make money. This is why you must be selective about who you work with and must understand everyone’s motives for being your friend. Problem people or potential problem people need to be identified, avoided, or eliminated from your circle as soon as possible. To block a problem person is not impolite, it’s essential!
People regularly fake being nice to others and fake friendships if they think it will benefit them financially, business-wise, or gain them stability or advancement. Think about it again, people get into unhappy relationships, get married and have children on a very regular basis for far less! You must continually assess those you deal with and especially those who consider you as their friend because most will be just trying to use you in one way or another.
Sadly, many see people who are too nice as being weak, but I will always say it’s best to remain humble, since it will make others display their true characters a lot faster. Always keep your problems to yourself because most people will seek to exploit them for their own benefit, even if they pretend to show sympathy. Understand trust and loyalty are conditional and expect and plan for betrayal.
So, in life, in business, especially the close protection or investigations business, you should keep things real, be everyone’s friend with established boundaries, and remember you have no friends.
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Social Navigation: A Practical Survival Guide For Human Interactions
In this book I’m sharing some of my experiences, in addition to giving you hard love advice on how to deal with those who you encounter.
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Truth Only Has Few Friends 